CARDI B: Overcoming Depression, Blocking Out the Hate & Owning Your Power

with Cardi B

Published October 6, 2025
View Show Notes

About This Episode

Jay Shetty interviews Cardi B about her inner world, from the quiet, imaginative child planning her future to the global star navigating fame, motherhood, and relentless public scrutiny. She opens up in detail about growing up in the Bronx, her determination to escape poverty and be financially independent before having kids, and the hustle it took to build her music career. Cardi also shares candidly about severe depression linked to marital struggles, the toll of online hate on her creativity, her tough-love parenting style, deep faith in God, and the inspiration behind her new album "Am I the Drama".

Topics Covered

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Quick Takeaways

  • Cardi B describes always having a vivid inner world as a child, spending time alone planning her future and refusing to accept raising her kids in the environment she grew up in.
  • She details how growing up in the Bronx exposed her to harassment, verbal attacks, and poverty, shaping both her sharp wit and her insistence on becoming financially independent before motherhood.
  • Cardi explains that despite public assumptions, gaps between her music releases were driven by a lack of a full body of work and a period of intense depression, not just pregnancy or laziness.
  • She recounts a deep depressive episode tied to feeling the love dying in her marriage, choosing separation, and then slowly letting her heart, not just her mind, reach the point of being done.
  • Harsh online reactions to her songs feel like people smashing a cake she worked hard to bake, leading her to question whether releasing music is worth the blow to her mental health.
  • Cardi emphasizes that she meticulously hustled her way into the industry, funding her own shows to prove fan demand, and is angered by narratives that her success was handed to her.
  • As a mother, she is strict about tutoring and activities, curses with humor, and is obsessed with instilling work ethic so her kids never grow up lazy or dependent on her success.
  • She defines love as effort and studying your partner, sharing how a perfectly timed joke from her boyfriend while she was crying reminded her that things would be okay.
  • Her album "Am I the Drama" reflects a lifelong feeling of being blamed or at the center of drama even when she tries to avoid it, and her constant questioning of why trouble finds her.
  • Cardi says she talks to God daily like a friend, believes in personal angels, sees prayer as the most powerful gift she can give, and refuses to "let the devil win" by giving up on her blessings.

Podcast Notes

Introduction and setting the tone

Jay introduces Cardi B and the intention of the conversation

Jay shares that Cardi B has been his dream guest since launching the podcast six years ago[2:02]
He notes that externally they're very different, but he believes there is a spiritual connection they will explore
Cardi mentions recently seeing a Jay Shetty video about asking difficult questions in relationships[2:26]
She wanted to send it to her boyfriend because it resonated with their situation around asking and working through hard questions
Her boyfriend agreed with the message, and Cardi jokes that time will tell if it changes his behavior

Cardi's hidden talent and early intellectual curiosity

Cardi says she knows many random presidential facts and can sometimes name the 46 presidents in order[3:06]
She explains that as a child she often lacked video games and sometimes even cable, so she read a lot instead
She loved reading factual and history books[3:39]
She would read her entire school history textbook front to back in a week simply out of boredom

Fame, anonymity, and Cardi's inner world

Navigating public recognition and desire for anonymity

Cardi explains she doesn't always look glam and can often go out relatively unnoticed[4:28]
She typically wears oversized hoodies and sometimes glasses, and during COVID masks helped her stay anonymous
She often runs errands alone without security, like going to Whole Foods to buy steak[4:37]
If someone recognizes her, she moves quickly and "maneuvers" around people to keep it brief

Childhood solitude and mental universe

Cardi's sister recalls seeing Cardi alone in the school cafeteria with her head down and feeling bad for her[5:58]
Cardi clarifies she was not lonely; she simply needed time to think and be by herself
She describes constantly living in her thoughts with many internal voices[6:23]
She likens it to playing dollhouse or building a universe in her head, planning scenarios, homes, and a future life
Cardi has always been planning tomorrow and five years ahead in her mind[6:58]
She says people may think she is spaced out, but she is actually deep in her internal universe
She feels she has achieved almost everything she planned and dreamed of since age five[7:28]
She dreamed of being beautiful like her mother and becoming very successful, and says those dreams came true
She always hated being poor, refused to raise kids in the hood, and made a promise to find another way
Cardi emphasizes she reached her dream job, not just a backup plan[8:30]
She had backup plans B, C, and D but didn't have to use them; instead, she is living her primary dream, albeit with more difficulty than she imagined

Discovering her calling and early confidence

Sense of destiny and confusion about specific talent

Her grandmother often told her she would be a superstar and urged her to practice singing[9:00]
Cardi notes her grandma had many grandkids but said this specifically to her, which she found striking
Teachers and friends also told Cardi and her sister they would be "somebody" someday[9:59]
Cardi, however, was unsure of her specific calling because she liked acting and singing but was not the best in school plays or choir
She was naturally funny but could not see herself as a stand-up comedian[10:28]
For years she wondered what exactly she was meant to be, until she feels God revealed it through her music career

Innate personality and quiet side

Cardi says she was born bold and outspoken, with a mix of her parents' strong personalities[11:46]
She describes both parents as loud with strong characters, though different from each other
Despite her public image, she insists she is naturally quiet and spends a lot of time alone in her room thinking[12:07]
She often talks to friends on the phone all day but prefers not to see people in person and rarely goes out to dinners or casual hangs
Her friends are not offended because they understand her personality and boundaries
She likes partying but says she has had little time for it lately and even before fame she was not a club girl outside work[13:05]
As a dancer, she already worked in clubs, so going to clubs for fun held no appeal; she focused instead on working and "the bigger picture"

Growing up in the Bronx and deciding to escape the hood

Why she refused to raise kids in the hood

Cardi explains that kids can end up on the wrong path despite having good parents, due to environment and peer pressure[14:52]
She notes her parents are law-abiding, hardworking, and not criminals, yet environment can still derail children
She observes that kids in the hood often grow up faster than kids elsewhere[14:06]
At age 11 in sixth grade, some girls in her class were already sexually active, while her nieces today at 11 mostly play Roblox
Cardi describes aggressive behavior from boys in the Bronx[15:42]
She recalls walking down the block and typical "bad boys" slapping girls' behinds or faces if they protested, and groping being common

Developing a sharp tongue as self-defense

Cardi says school life demanded toughness, contributing to why she is witty and quick with her mouth[16:15]
Boys constantly picked on kids' shoes, hair, and appearance, so she would practice jokes in the mirror at home to be ready to clap back
She would anticipate specific boys flaming her and prepare jokes to throw back at them the next day

Housing conditions and welfare experience

No matter how clean her family kept their apartment, there were still roaches and mice because of neighbors[17:41]
Her mother made her clean obsessively-brushing corners by hand, daily dishes, mopping, and taking out trash-yet building conditions still brought pests
A formative memory was going with her mom to apply for welfare[18:12]
The social worker spoke rudely and "like a dog" to her mom, who usually would not tolerate disrespect but endured it because they needed help
Cardi was angry and humiliated for her mom, vowing she never wanted to be in a position where someone could talk to her that way because she needed assistance

Financial independence, motherhood goals, and leaving dependence behind

Why women need their own money

Cardi stresses that as a woman, even if you have a man with money, you must have your own[19:20]
She has seen aunts and cousins abandoned or given minimal support when relationships ended, men went to jail, or street partners disappeared
She emphasizes that in theory there are two parents, but in reality often the mother ends up solely responsible financially and emotionally
Her goal was always to be a mother but to have her own stability first[19:55]
She wanted a big family and did not want to raise kids in the hood or be at the mercy of a partner's income or choices
She now has three kids and still wants about six in total[20:40]
She jokes that with many kids, there is a higher chance she will not end up in a living assistance home because there will be more family around

Making it in music and the fragile feeling of success

Moments when she felt she "made it"

Being on TV for the first time did not feel like she had made it[21:51]
She saw other reality TV girls end up back in the strip club, so she viewed TV as "almost there" but not security
Signing to a label felt closer, but she still did not feel she had arrived[22:06]
She only truly felt she had made it when "Bodak Yellow" came out and she earned her first real million dollars that was completely hers

Feeling unsafe even after success

Even with success, Cardi says she has never felt comfortable and still does not feel secure[22:31]
She feels she has to fight every day to maintain her level of success because people constantly try to take it from her or tell her she does not deserve it
She distinguishes between the hard work everyone does at their jobs and the unique pain of being told you do not deserve the job you work hard for[23:44]
Millions may love you, but millions of others can get into your head insisting you did not earn your position, which deeply affects mental health

Delays in music, depression, and creative vulnerability

Clarifying misconceptions about why she has not released albums

Cardi says people claim she delays music because she keeps getting pregnant, but they ignore timelines[24:30]
She canceled a Bruno Mars tour after her first child because she had no nanny or night nurse and was learning postpartum life on her own
Three months after giving birth she was doing four to five shows a week until COVID hit
After COVID, she released "WAP" and then got pregnant again[25:16]
She insists the reason she did not release an album then was not pregnancy but that she lacked a complete body of work
Last year she planned an album but entered the deepest depression of her life[25:37]
During this depressive period she could not function, eat, or sleep, which halted her projects

How criticism of her music feels

Cardi likens making music to baking a cake and practicing to perfect it[26:23]
When people respond to a song by saying it is the worst thing ever, it feels like they are smashing the cake she worked hard to bake, referencing a "Simpsons" scene
She compares harsh criticism of her music to someone telling a woman her sexuality is trash and she should never have sex again[27:13]
Such reactions make her question her craft and bring her down so much she sometimes avoids releasing music to protect her peace of mind
She says she had not felt as low as she did the week before the interview for almost a year[29:02]

Marriage struggles, depression, and letting the heart catch up

Depression driven by career pressure and a dying marriage

Cardi says her deep depression was caused by both career pressure and feeling the love dying in her marriage[32:37]
She felt the love fading from both her side and her husband's side and chose loneliness by deciding she could no longer continue in the same pattern
She tried to enforce boundaries with her mind but her heart lagged[33:42]
She promised herself she would not contact him for a month and would not forgive easily, but she cried every day, felt constant hurt, and was alone in a mansion in LA thinking about it

Pregnancy, accountability, and feeling taken advantage of

When she got pregnant again, she decided to accept and apologize for her own flaws in the marriage[34:32]
She resolved to work on herself, but when she took accountability, her partner took advantage of it, assuming she would always come back
That dynamic "killed everything" emotionally while she had a human growing inside her[34:53]
She obsessed over what life would be like without him as a partner, co-parent, or friend, which deepened her sadness and depression

Reaching emotional closure and feeling strong again

Cardi says she eventually overcame that period and feels the strongest she has ever been[37:13]
She compares this strength to when she was 22-24 years old, when she felt she was "living in a power" and says she feels that way again now
She emphasizes that it took months for her heart, not just her mind and words, to genuinely say "you're done"[37:18]
She even asked Shakira, whom she worked with, how she overcame similar issues, and was told it would happen with time

Coping mechanisms: therapy, time, and social pressure

Therapy and letting things die on their own

Cardi tried therapy via Zoom and found herself telling a stranger her deepest feelings for three hours[37:38]
She did several sessions but felt it did not provide the relief or resolutions she needed at that time
She believes she ultimately had to allow the situation and feelings to "die on their own" over time[37:38]

Multiple pressures converging on her mental health

While breaking down at home, she also faced fans pressuring her for an album, haters criticizing her, and peers trying to start problems[38:34]
She tried to cope by working and sleeping, but it felt like too much at once
After giving birth to her daughter, she took a break and went out with friends every weekend[39:02]
It was scary to start talking to someone new and give them even a small piece of herself, but that was part of her reset

Time as the ultimate healer

Jay shares a client story about heartbreak to illustrate how time gradually reduces pain even when you do not notice it[39:35]
Cardi agrees that time heals but insists people should still seek help in the meantime
She notes that even when she "bossed up," worked, and went out, there was still a lingering pain in her heart[41:10]
She describes coming home at 4:30 a.m. after partying, drunk and realizing she was alone with no one to talk to, which felt very lonely
Her message is not to avoid those feelings but to trust that time will eventually heal them[41:43]

Perfectionism, hustle, and anger at narratives about her success

Why criticism of her songs cuts so deep

Cardi says she is not lazy and works hard to improve her accent, flows, and every aspect of her craft[42:56]
She acknowledges some people view her accent as a flaw, but she sees it as a unique superpower that makes her distinct
She is a perfectionist, whether in music, marketing, business, or even stripping in the past[43:20]
As a dancer, she practiced pole work every day, busting her body to become the best in the club; she brings that same mentality to music

Documented grind to get a record deal

Cardi rejects claims that her rap career was handed to her or based solely on personality or TV fame[44:14]
Labels initially offered bad deals and did not take her seriously; some saw her as just funny from Instagram and reality TV
She reinvested hosting money (around $15,000 per party) into staging her own concerts[45:16]
She rented venues, cars, and buses to perform for 400-800 people, documented crowds singing her mixtape songs, and used that proof to persuade labels to sign her
She is infuriated by online narratives that she did not put the work in or that success was easy[46:40]
She highlights sacrifices like missed birthdays, family events, and strain on relationships and marriage, only to be told by people who "never did shit" that she does not deserve it

Devil, God, and not surrendering her blessings

Temptation to quit versus honoring God's gifts

After the recent backlash to a song, Cardi cried and told a friend she sometimes feels like letting the devil win for peace of mind[48:18]
She later realized how wrong it was to consider handing everything she begged God for over to the devil because of human criticism
She uses a metaphor of a child asking for something from God, receiving it, and then rejecting it because others call it ugly[49:27]
She imagines how hurtful it must be to God to see her devalue blessings he gave after years of prayer
This week she feels stronger, determined not to let the devil win, and refused to cancel planned rollout activities because of online comments[49:57]

Being misunderstood: humor, roughness, and compassion

Humor style that does not always translate online

Cardi believes she is often misunderstood because her humor can be rough even though she is not a dark-humor person[51:48]
She grew up with Bronx boys and Caribbean family culture where people jokingly call someone "shaped like a candle" or compare body types to yams
She recounts a recent incident where fans started a joke, she continued it, refused to apologize, and was accused of being mean and bullying[52:49]
She insists her intent was not to hurt anyone; to her, it felt like normal joking among friends, not malice

Strong compassion behind the rough mouth

Cardi says she is actually very compassionate and sympathetic, sometimes crying over tragedies happening far away[53:34]
As a Libra, she says she always sees both sides and even feels bad for women who slept with her man if they experience a family loss
Her family and friends also speak bluntly; they give advice in rude-sounding ways that are nonetheless truthful and caring[54:30]
She talks to everyone in the same direct way, including her kids, and does not have "yes men" around her

Motherhood, discipline, and work ethic for her children

Parenting style: tough love and humor

Cardi openly curses at her kids in a humorous way but believes she is a great mom[55:05]
She imitates herself telling them not to ask for Roblox or iPads and jokes that she still gives them everything yet they love her deeply
She notes that giving kids everything does not automatically make a great parent, citing the Menendez brothers whose parents provided but lacked love[57:22]
For her, the proof she is a good mom is how much her kids enjoy being with her, finding her funny even when she is scolding them

Instilling ambition and rejecting laziness

Cardi's biggest wish for her kids is that they not be bums or lazy[1:01:40]
She wants them to become their own person, not coast on their parents' status or money
She is proud of her mom and grandmothers' work ethic despite humble jobs and many children[1:01:54]
One grandmother had 10 kids and one had 13, worked every day, cooked and sold food, and brought children to America one by one
She wants her kids one day to be able to say she worked every day and deserved everything she has[1:03:05]
She warns her son not to be known as just someone's son and her daughters not to be just a pretty face; she wants them to be bosses

Providing support without enabling laziness

Cardi says she will help with an apartment or car when they are 18 if they are working toward something like college or a business[1:04:36]
However, if she FaceTimes them at noon and they are still in bed, she will take back the car or support because they "need the real world"
She insists they will not be allowed to "be nothing" after all her hard work[1:03:35]

Structured education and enrichment

Her kids have school until 3 p.m. and then mandatory tutoring four times a week in reading and math[1:06:42]
On top of tutoring, Kulture has piano or gym class, and her son has sports class
She does not accept excuses about being sleepy and views this routine as necessary discipline[1:07:03]
She wants her kids to be better than her-able to swim, dance, and have strong grammar-skills she feels she lacks
She acknowledges kids will be mad and cry but believes they will one day appreciate the standards she set[1:08:08]

What makes Cardi B happy

Sources of joy in her daily life

Her kids make her very happy with their cuteness, funny comments, and emerging personalities[1:08:49]
She finds it hilarious when her baby hits her siblings and they just take it, because it is a small baby doing it
Romance and feeling cared for by a partner also make her happy[1:09:32]
She references hearing Selena Gomez say that after a 14-hour day, a single caring phone call can feel really good, and Cardi agrees
Spending time with cousins and family cracking jokes feels like childhood and brings happiness[1:10:04]
Music and successfully executed plans with her team give her a rush of joy and motivation[1:10:12]
Seeing hard work on a rollout or project land well makes her thank God and want to keep going

Love, effort, and being studied by a partner

Her definition of love

Cardi defines love primarily as effort[1:11:05]
She values being called, having someone study her, and having a partner with personality and humor who can make her laugh even when she is crying
She recalls crying to her boyfriend about pressure and being comforted by a perfectly timed joke[1:11:27]
The joke made her laugh so hard that snot came out of her nose and made her feel like things would be okay

What it means to be "studied" in love

Cardi distinguishes between generic gifts like expensive purses and gestures that show her partner has listened to her deeper interests[1:12:07]
She describes her obsession with castles and Versailles, and how her partner rented a hot, inconvenient castle just to fulfill that dream
She says she is hard to figure out, and she only gradually opens up and shows more of her real self over time[1:14:10]

New album "Am I the Drama" and constant conflict

Why she is releasing now and how it feels

Cardi says it has been seven years since she released new music and she now feels confident about this body of work[1:14:15]
She believes the music feels good and fills something people have been missing

Meaning behind the title "Am I the Drama"

Cardi traces the concept back to always getting blamed or in trouble as a child, even when situations were not her idea[1:15:12]
At sleepovers, aunts would pull her ears assuming it was her idea, and when she fought at school, her mom assumed she did not avoid the fight
She feels the same pattern now: always in scandals or beefs despite trying to avoid drama[1:16:05]
"Am I the drama?" captures her confusion over why she is persistently in the middle of chaos, as if her life is always in the roughest part of the ocean instead of smooth sailing

Public drama, authenticity, and filtering herself

How televised drama feels

Cardi says having her drama televised can feel okay when people cheer for her, but often it is overwhelming and stressful[1:18:04]
People want her to be the kind of celebrity who never responds, but she insists those other celebrities feel the same pressures; she is just the one who says it aloud
She sees being outspoken as both a blessing and a curse[1:19:12]
Other celebrities tell her she says what they wish they could say, yet she also becomes a punching bag and is told to stop reacting

Evolving self-control and fear of losing what she built

Cardi admits it sometimes feels good to tell critics off harshly, but she cannot do it all the time[1:20:22]
She jokes she could be a piranha with her mouth but today is a "goldfish," holding back some of what she could say
She believes age, kids, and life have changed her, softening her and making her more cautious[1:21:55]
She notes that as you get older you become wiser, more afraid, and have more to lose than when you started dreaming

Life's unending challenges, work ethic, and spiritual connection

Life is always something to figure out

Cardi says she is still trying to figure out life in general and wonders when it will get easier[1:26:12]
She believes problems exist whether you are poor or rich; people are always trying to figure themselves and life out
She points out that with age come new problems: back issues, more losses, more kids to worry about, more money to manage[1:27:13]

Hard work behind visible success

She argues that successful people with money work extremely hard and that is why they are at the top[1:27:46]
She cites Beyoncé's "insane work ethic" and her partner waking at 5:30-6:00 a.m. and working until 7 p.m. as examples
She details her own exhaustion: back and butt hurt, headache, doing promo, studio, and constant daily work[1:28:51]
Her stance is that if you want it, you must do it every day with no complaining, recognizing everyone has a job

Talking to God like a friend

Cardi says she talks to God every day, more like talking than formal praying[1:29:29]
She speaks to God the same way she talks to Jay, including cursing and crying, because she believes God knows who she is
She believes God gave her angels and that she has a strong spiritual connection[1:29:57]
She will not try to convince non-believers, but says she cannot doubt the being she has prayed to her whole life who gave her what she asked for
Cardi suggests the imaginary friend or inner voice many people think is themselves is actually their conversation with God[1:30:36]
She says the most powerful thing she can give someone is to pray for them, and that praying together can lead to miracles

Final five rapid-fire questions

Best and worst advice

Best advice she recalls is the idea that asking difficult questions in relationships can either break them or make them stronger through understanding[1:32:15]
Worst advice includes people telling her to wear certain outfits or drop specific songs that did not feel right to her[1:33:01]

Non-negotiables and shifting values

One thing she will never fully apologize for is her mouth, though she admits sometimes she might apologize if she was too harsh[1:33:11]
Something she used to value but no longer does is "the streets"[1:33:30]
She respects that the streets shaped her mentality but would never advise loved ones or young people to romanticize them because the streets are grimy and do not love you back

Law she would create

If she could make one law, it would mandate extreme physical punishment for people who hurt children[1:34:25]
She says men who hurt kids should be castrated and for women something similar should be done, because children are precious and innocent, even as she jokes some seem born evil

Lessons Learned

Actionable insights and wisdom you can apply to your business, career, and personal life.

1

Emotional closure and healing follow the heart's timeline, not just the mind's decisions; you can declare an ending, but true freedom only comes when your feelings have had time to catch up.

Reflection Questions:

  • Where in your life have you decided something is over intellectually but still feel emotionally attached?
  • How could you give yourself more time and space for your heart to process a difficult change instead of forcing yourself to "move on" immediately?
  • What small, healthy routines could you put in place this week to support yourself while time does its slow work of healing?
2

Success does not eliminate struggle; maintaining it requires continuous work, boundaries, and refusing to let external criticism make you surrender what you prayed and worked for.

Reflection Questions:

  • What hard-won success or opportunity in your life are you currently undervaluing because of other people's opinions?
  • How might your daily habits need to change if you treated maintaining your progress as seriously as achieving it?
  • What is one specific boundary you could set this week to protect your mental health from unnecessary criticism or negativity?
3

Financial independence is a form of emotional and practical security, especially in relationships and parenting, because it reduces your vulnerability to other people's choices.

Reflection Questions:

  • In what ways are you currently financially dependent on others, and how comfortable are you with that risk?
  • How could building even a modest independent income stream change the way you show up in your relationships and decisions?
  • What is one concrete financial step-saving, learning a skill, or exploring a side hustle-you could take in the next month to increase your independence?
4

Instilling discipline and opportunity in children-through structure, expectations, and exposure to skills-does more for their future than simply giving them material comfort.

Reflection Questions:

  • If you have or influence children, what messages are your actions sending them about work, learning, and responsibility?
  • How could you better balance providing support with ensuring that the young people in your life still experience effort, consequences, and growth?
  • What is one routine, class, or responsibility you could introduce or reinforce that would help a child you care about develop stronger discipline or capability?
5

Being authentically yourself-including a strong personality or unconventional style-can be a strength, but it becomes more powerful when paired with selective self-control and awareness of impact.

Reflection Questions:

  • Where in your life do you hold back your real personality out of fear, and where might you be overexpressing it without considering others?
  • How could you decide more intentionally when to speak your full truth and when to filter yourself to protect your peace or relationships?
  • What is one situation coming up where you want to show up as fully yourself, and what would a thoughtful, grounded version of that look like?
6

Treating your relationship with the divine or your inner guidance like an ongoing conversation-rather than a distant ritual-can provide grounding, comfort, and a sense of being accompanied in hard times.

Reflection Questions:

  • How do you currently relate to your sense of God, spirituality, or inner wisdom: as a distant concept or as something you can talk to honestly?
  • In what moments of stress or confusion could you experiment with speaking out your thoughts, as if to a trusted friend, instead of keeping them bottled up?
  • What simple daily practice-like a brief check-in, written note, or spoken reflection-could you adopt to strengthen your sense of guidance and support?

Episode Summary - Notes by Jordan

CARDI B: Overcoming Depression, Blocking Out the Hate & Owning Your Power
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